by Rosemari
1. “Do you have any advice on people I might want to reach out to?” – me to a director of a large government agency in an informational interview
In August, I graduated with my Masters from American University. Like most of my fellow graduates, I hit the pavement, trying to find a paying position between pulling espresso shots and my dream job. Along the way, I got bundles of advice from all kinds of great, helpful people. Some of it I knew (networking is important; don’t have typos on your cover letter or resume). Some of it was new (you will be judged based on your social media presence; your personal references can be held against you). And some of it was, for lil’ ol’ me, somewhat shocking to hear in 2011. Here are a few “gems:”
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“If your parents know members of Congress, you should call them now.” – Director of aforementioned government agency
This advice exemplifies nepotism at its best. When I walked into his office, I had already proved myself with two months of quality work. But after this comment, I knew that no matter how hard I worked or how much I deserved a position, it wasn’t going to be enough to land me a full-time jig (at least not in his mind). While it was an extremely condescending moment for me, I also knew it was, in part, the truth.
2. “Should I apply to this department?” – me to a very helpful manager in a large government agency
“Yes, but you won’t get in. And if you do, they will never promote you or let you try anything new. You are a woman and it’s still an old boys club.” – Very helpful manager in a large government agency
Old boys club? Huh? In 2011?
While I hate this advice, it came from one of my biggest cheerleaders, who tried every trick in the book to make sure I was gainfully employed. I knew that it was well intentioned – the last thing she wanted was for me not to reach my potential because of a silly thing like gender. It made me wonder how many of my applications were overlooked because of my gender. And whether or not I wanted to spend my professional life breaking through glass ceilings.
3. “This position about international family planning looks awesome. What do you think of the organization?” – Me to an international family planning consultant
“[The organization] is only good if you have a penis.” – International family planning consultant
Errr... Well, I guess won’t waste my time spell checking that cover letter. Once again, even if I landed a position in an organization like that, I knew it would be an uphill battle. And I also knew that thanks to decades of work done before me, I was privileged to encounter this response a handful of times. But, in my opinion, a handful is still too many.
Luckily, I am extremely fortunate to find gainful employment that I love, with a little help from Facebook, a former classmate, and a great organization willing to take a chance on me. But I wonder how discrimination plays either for or against job hunters every day – and whether or not people are typically so forthcoming in saying it out loud.
